*Killer speech by Zimbabwe President Robert Mugabe:* (Satire)

“Racism will never end as long as white cars are still using black tyres.

Racism will never end if people still use black to symbolise bad luck and white for peace.

Racism will never end if people still wear white clothes to weddings and black clothes to funerals.

Racism will never end as long as those who don’t pay their bills are blacklisted not white listed.

Even when playing snooker, you haven’t won until you’ve sunk the black ball, and the white ball must remain on the table!

I don’t care, as long as I’m still using white toilet paper to wipe my black ass, I’m happy.”